Long time, no see. To start off with, I want to apologize for dropping off the social media planet. I feel as though recently, I have had a real shifting of life goals and focus of where I see myself being in the future.
Obviously this hasn't happened overnight, and it has been a really interesting process for me. I am not entirely sure when it started but I knew I just wasn't happy with where I was in my 'career'. I felt like I have always forced myself into what I thought was an ideal version of what I wanted to be, or how I felt others wanted me to be. Yes, I am a perfectionist, which can often work in my favor but more often than not, makes me feel as though I'm not doing 'it' right. Weather that be work or life related.
When I was growing up, I always felt like there were specific steps to take and certain milestones everyone reached to get into their career path. You go to school, pick out what you like and what you want to do, choose your subjects accordingly. Then work your butt off to get into the university course that will get you the job you want, then 'tada!' you will be working in a steady and stable full time job (yes, I was a little naive).
So, when after having gone through this whole process, coming out of my university degree still not knowing exactly where I wanted to take my life. I really felt a little bit of a failure, but mainly I felt like I was letting my family down. I am really close with my family, and it felt like I was disappointing them by not slotting straight into a job relating to my degree. Don't get me wrong I loved everything I learnt in my course and still love to build on that nutrition, health and well-being knowledge base that I have acquired. It really is my passion, but I knew that I didn't want to work behind a computer. I really love interacting with people, working with people and helping them on a daily basis.
It has taken me almost 2 years to feel comfortable in my own 'career', while still having future goals and things I want to achieve. This is largely due to having such a strong support base, my family and partner, allowing me to see that so long as I'm happy and can support myself, I can be anything I want to be!
If you have made it to the end of this ramble, well-done and thank you!
I realise that we all go through stages in our lives where we don't even know which way is up, let alone which direction we are heading. What I wish I had know while going through this, was that no matter where I am, it is good enough. That I will be happy, so long as I keep making choices that honor my true self, not what I think would make me look good to others or how I think I 'should' be.
Take home message from this ramble;
Don't compare your life to others.
Your life will be different to everyone else's.
You will have your own purpose and it is just as important as anyone else's.
Live your life to fill your own potential, don't try and shape yourself into something your not to fit certain expectations.
Know you are loved and love in return.
Courtney xo